X

My Survival Christmas Tree

A tree for the end times...

Jeff’s Note: Hi folks, although our offices are closed until January 3, I still wanted to reach out and wish you a Merry Christmas as we gather with our loved ones.

It’s been another hectic year, but for today let’s relax, appreciate those closest to us, and enjoy some good food.

Thank you for following along with me on your trading journey, and we’ll see you in the new year with new insights and ideas.

Happy Holidays.


The Clark household has five Christmas trees. My kids get to decorate one, and they do so predictably. The tree is covered in candy canes, strings of popcorn and cranberries, and a bunch of homemade ornaments only a parent can love.

My wife, the Martha Stewart of Northern California, decorates three trees. They look like they popped out of a Neiman Marcus catalog. Everyone “oohs” and “aahs” whenever they see them.

My tree, however, is the one all of our friends look forward to seeing.

Several years ago, I started decorating my Christmas tree in the theme of the current economic and political environment.

One year, for example, I painstakingly created my own ornaments for a Global Warming Tree. I froze ceramic figurines of polar bears and arctic seals in cubes of ice. I inserted a metal hanger in each one and placed the ornaments on the tree. As the ice melted, the ceramic figurines would fall and shatter onto the hardwood floor below.

My liberal friends thought the tree was a sensitive statement displaying the threats of mankind’s abuse of the environment. My conservative friends thought it was a hilarious expression of sarcasm. It was the perfect politically agnostic tree.

Not so this year. Yesterday, I unveiled my Survival Tree.

It’s a six-foot potted apple tree. You may recall stories of the Great Depression, when men would set up shop selling apples on street corners. Well, I’m one step ahead of that.

Free Trading Resources

Have you checked out Jeff’s free trading resources on his website? It contains a selection of special reports, training videos, and a full trading glossary to help kickstart your trading career – at zero cost to you. Just click here to check it out.

The trunk is covered with burlap sacks that fan out at the bottom – like a tent. So, I have shelter and something to catch rainwater.

The Christmas lights wrap around the top of the tree, and they flicker on and off, controlled by a dial. This allows me to send Morse code signals to other survivalists.

The ornaments are made of empty shotgun shells, small bottles of water, canned foods like Spam, refried beans, and tuna fish, and a bunch of gold and silver coins (the chocolate variety – but you get my point).

For tinsel, I bought a bag of shredded U.S. currency and meticulously hung each strand on the tree.

I painted gold bricks and toy guns that surrounded the base of the tree. The message to my friends was simple, and it was written on a small cardboard placard…

“Buy yer own darn gold, ‘cause you ain’t gettin’ any of mine!”

I hope my friends take my advice. And I hope you do, too.

Merry Christmas.

Best regards and good trading,

Jeff Clark

Reader Mailbag

What would you decorate your “survival tree” with to represent this past year both politically and financially?

Let us know your thoughts – and any questions you have – at feedback@jeffclarktrader.com.